When something really matters, do you have the skills to persuade an alternate view?

We often shy away from difficult conversations because we don’t know how to phrase them in such a way that it generates a win/win result. But if you don’t address the elephant in the room, the situation could escalate to the point where there is no chance of repairing the situation or relationship.

Persuasive speaking skills can be learned. One of the most effective techniques to use is to tell a story. Here’s an example:-

John Tonkin was the Premier of Western Australia many years ago. Prior to entering politics, he was a school headmaster. He told me a story once that has stayed with me for years. Whenever he had an irate parent come to see him, they always went for a walk around the school. He said the anger diminished rapidly and the conversations were nearly always amicable by the end. He set up an atmosphere of “let’s talk about this” rather than “you’re wrong and I’m right”.

It’s one of the reasons they say so much business gets done on the golf course. Or if you’re stuck inside, in the corridor.

If you have a situation you need to de-escalate, would you now consider going for a walk outside or in the corridor? Or would you choose to sit at a desk in a stuffy office with restricted views (or worse, no windows or view of outside at all) where both parties feel trapped? Of course you would, because the story gave a very clear example of how it can work, and it’s relatable. All in 33…